Changing the World

December 27, 2014

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By Terence T. Gorski,
Author

What we do makes a difference. It may not seem like it in the moment, but I believe it to be true. What we believe, think and do does count for something.

I like to think that each person, in his or her own way, changes the world just a little bit by how they live their lives. We are all part of the evolution of consciousness. My work means nothing unless it is used by people to make their lives better. This is true of all the work we do. If it is not embraced and found to bring good to other people it means nothing. By finding our purpose in life and standing on our personal truth we all join in pushing the world toward recovery consciousness — which just might change the world.
Terence T. Gorski
December 27, 2014


Change! It’s Not Easy For Anyone

May 25, 2014

20140525-210010-75610584.jpgBy Terence T. Gorski, Author
December 29, 2013

“Do you think it’s easy to change? Alas, it is very hard to change and
be different. It means passing through the waters of oblivion.” —

DH Lawrence

DH Lawrence, also know as Lawrence of Arabia, was an incredibly disciplined man. He was a soldier, a warrior, a writer, and a philosopher. Reviewing this brief biography of DH Lawrence will put the man in more perspective and add more meaning to this quote.

Yet even such a man, with years of military discipline, living for months at a time in the harsh desert, having to adapt to unknown cultures — yet even such a man tells us that “it is hard to change and to be different!”

There are two issues:

(1) It is difficult to change and maintain the changes; and

(2) It is difficult to be different from most other people.

The pressure of he crowd is difficult to resist. As human beings, we are social animals connected with a group mind or a collective unconscious. We feel strongly the united emotional play of any groups that we are in.

DH Lawrence had a conceptual ability that was more advanced than those around him. He viewed of the world and life through a different pair of classes. He could see complex relationships and cause-effect changes of events that few other noticed. He was a difficult man to trick, or con, or persuade.

He maintained his unique world view, but again, he reports that it was not easy to “be different.” It is not easy to stand on your own values and speak your own truth to authority or to an angry mob.”

How difficult did DH Lawrence find it to develop a rational philosophy of life and not surrender it for a mere sense of superficial belonging. How hard was it for him to maintain his own ideas in the face of the social pressure of the tribe and the threat of the mob (group mind)? He put it this way:

To change and to be different from your fellows
“means passing through the waters of oblivion.”

We can all learn to change and embrace a sober and responsible way of life. It will be much easier to maintain that change if we surround ourselves with like-minded people.

LIVE SOBER – BE RESPONSIBLE – LIVE FREE

GORSKI BOOKS


Transformational Experiences

April 12, 2012

hope (1)By Terence T. GorskiAuthor
GORSKI BOOKS available from www.amazon.com

Many people have told me that we can recover from anything and everything that happens to us. I wish that were true, I really do, but if we define recovery as returning to the kind of person we had been before the trauma, I don’t believe it.

We cannot totally recover from all of the things that we experience. Once we know something we cannot unknown it. Once we see something, we cannot unsee it. Once innocence and the naive idealism of inexperience are lost they cannot be regained.

Some things change us. Even if we are resilient, when we bounce back we are difference. This is because some of what happens to us in life are TRANSFORMATIONAL EXPERIENCES. The most common transformational experience for most women is childbirth. You don’t just have a baby and go on with your life unchanged. Childbirth transforms most women.

Combat is a transformational experience. You don’t train and then put yourself in harm’s way knowing you are at risk of being maimed or killed or being called upon to maim or kill others without the experience transforming you on a deep level.

The are POSITIVE TRANSFORMATIONAL EXPERIENCES that build us up and give us hope: our first love; the birth of a new child; the hug of a loved one; meeting a new friend; falling in love again when we never though we could; a spiritual experience that opens us with joy and reverence to the beauty around and within us. These powerful experiences change us, because as we make sense of what has happened our view of ourselves, others, and the world opens us to new possibilities.

There are also TRAUMATIC TRANSFORMATIONAL EXPERIENCES that wound us deeply, crash our dreams on the jagged rocks of harsh reality, and shake the very foundations if our faith human goodness.

We all experience them from time-to-time. As unpleasant as they may be, maturity teaches us that they are a part of life. We will all experience: the death of a loved one, the loss of a true love; the violation of trust by a close friend; or the personal confrontation with violence and brutality. Most of us will face serious injury or illness. We will all grow old suffering the loss of youthful ambition.

Most of us will survive even the worst of these experiences, recover from the trauma, and then start making sense out of what happened to us, why, and it means. The traumatic moment unbundles the deepest part of our spirit. Our will to live pushes us to move on step by step.

We assign meaning to he experience. We do an in inventory noting the parts of ourselves we have lost in the experience and the new parts of ourselves we have gained. We realize we are the same person, yet somehow we are fundamentally different. Our conscious awareness of ourselves, others, and the world has changed and it can never be put back the way it was.

Transformational experiences change us. We are no longer the same people we were before the experience. We have changed, either for the better or the worse. And the change is governed by the choices we make in interpreting and responding to the trauma. That is the choice we have to make – how will I allow this trauma to affect me?

In the aftermath of a trauma we can make decisions to adapt and grow in ways that strengthen us and make us better people; or we can make decisions to adapt in a way that weakens us, blocks our growth, and makes us bitter and miserable people. That choice is always ours.

If you’re feeling sorry for yourself think of Christopher Reeves. In spite of staggering losses, he made massive contributions to all around him and left a legacy for us all to follow.

Why did he do it? He chose each day to struggle to hold the emotional high ground — and I am sure it wasn’t easy. I am also sure he didn’t stay on the high ground all day every day, but he was resilient. He always bounced back to the best of his ability. This is all any of us can do.

Trust in yourself. Do the best you can in the moment. Believe that will be enough because it usually is.

In the aftermath of a transformation life experience, it is best to move slowly and carefully. We are on new ground and need to regain our footing. How we choose to move forward will set the stage for what we will do next in our lives.

The most important thing, however, is to know that you can stand up again, even if you are afraid you might fall; to be willing to try again even if you are afraid you might fail; to know that you still have a life to be lived and that there are still people you love and who love you.

Bill White has an excellent article describing recovery from addiction as a process of transformational change:

GORSKI BOOKS: www.relapse.org

LEARNING TO LIVE AGAIN – A Guide To Recovery

Straight Talk About Addiction by Terence T. Gorski

All of the books of Terence T. Gorski
are available from
www.amazon.com


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