Telling The Truth To Addicted Friends


By, Author
February 3, 2014

I care enough to tell you the truth, even when you don’t want to hear it. When most people avoid saying what you don’t want to hear, I whisper the truth annoyingly in your ear. When others blow smoke up your ass so you won’t get mad, I blow truth into you mind even when it makes you enraged. I would rather upset you than watch you die.

You are in trouble. You don’t even know what the problem is. That’s why your solutions that you have been working so hard at  are failing so miserably at building your life.

You’re an addict playing with poison because you mistakenly believe no one will get hurt. It feels good now, so what’s the problem. You tell yourself: “I can make a lot of money selling it, so why bother with school and getting a job. Besides, it aces me feel good and costs nothing because I pay for my own off of the profits.” Well, here’s the down side.

Addiction isn’t just about alcohol and drugs.
It is about being around dangerous and destructive people
who somehow manage to convince you that they are living the good life. 

You could have died or gone to jail many times. Every time you get into cars with drug-using and drug-dealing assholes who pretend to be your friends, you are putting yourself at risk. These are not good people. They are using and manipulating you. They don’t care if you live or die. You’re just one more replaceable running buddy. One more patsy they can use, manipulate, and then throw on the trash heap. You are one cog in their machine of destruction and death. As I said, they are not good people. They use, manipulate, hurt, and even kill people. Most overdose deaths are the result of the poison they sell mostly to kids that don’t know any better.

  • What is it in you head that makes you do these incredibly dangerous and stupid things?
  • Why are you drawn to addicts and criminals? Why do you want to try to win by playing the loser’s game?
  • What is that something in your head that keeps fucking you up?

These are the question you need to deal with. If you refuse to face it, things will keep getting worse.

So think about these things carefully:

  • What makes you trust obvious criminals and professional losers?
  • What makes you keep using drugs that cause you problems?
  • Why do you keep living a lifestyle that bring hell-fire down on your head?
  • What motivates you keep hurting those who love you the most while working hard to please those who don’t care about you?

Could it be that you’re addicted? Addiction isn’t just about alcohol and drugs. It is about the addictive and irresponsible thinking that drives you to be around dangerous and destructive people who somehow manage to convince you that they re living the good life.




15 Responses to Telling The Truth To Addicted Friends

  1. Guy Lamunyon says:

    Most addicts are already aware of their addiction. Letting them know that you are also aware and that their coverup is ineffective can begin a conversation leading to recovery. “Honesty is the best policy.” Ben Franklin

  2. inri13151 says:

    Wondering why I was also WAITING for something ANYTHING to SAVE ME from Myself…I found many caring and Highly Qualified Therapists Counselors and such.. I was NOT ready..anmd NOT until I surrendered was anything going to change.. I NOW am a Counselor/ Therapist and work in The recovery Field.. THEY also have to want to be ready and “SURRENDER to the concept that THEY have a disease and THIS WILL KILL THEM…
    \ NO-THING will bring about any change with out the connection to GOD/SELF and The KNOWING that They (I) can NOT do this recovery thing by myself!

    • Terry Gorski says:

      It’s easier to blame others for not helping than it is to take responsibility for helping yourself. It is part of the human condition. Why do for yourself what you can get others to do for you. Why put off until tomorrow that which you can avoid doing altogether. It’s not even specific to addiction — I see it as part of the human condition.

  3. Guy Lamunyon says:

    inri – How do you account for the rapid growth of secular recovery groups which do not endorse the disease concept? And how do you account for over 38 million Americans in natural recovery without any assistance? Just because YOU recovered in a certain way does not mean EVERYONE must follow your path. The ONE SIZE FITS ALL era is OVER ! ! ! !

    • inri13151 says:

      Dear Guy,
      I am merely stating, that any one I have met, (in Recovery) either gets it or doesnt, That “IF” we could have done recovery with out a GOD then we would have,( Secular Recovery?) why is this so difficult for so many to grasp.. WE are NOT in control,and thats really ok.If you disagree, I am OK with that as well…We merely agree to disagree, and as far as ONE SIZE fits all concept.. I do believe that MOST addictions are basically the same in nature…but thats just my opinion.. I have No facts nor any exceptional research (proof) I feel it and I live that way.
      Thanks for your comments I certainly appreciate your time to write and share your beliefs..we need all the help in this field we can muster amen?

      Your brother/servant in Christ Jesus
      Steven J Taormina

      • Terry Gorski says:

        Two people often appear to disagree when they become committed to opposite sides of an argument when there are really shades of grey in-between. Is a belief in God necessary to to recovery? Yes it is for some people. Other people can recover by focussing upon other skills that allow them to break free of their addictive beliefs, thinking, and motivations. Rather than argue, it would be interesting to describe the tools of recovery that are similar in people who both believe in God as the center of their recovery and those who don’t.

      • inri13151 says:

        I guess that similarity is FUNCTIONAL vs DYSFUNCTIONAL..changes that are made

    • inri13151 says:

      Dear Guy,
      I was not aware that 38 million people were and are recovering with out GOD..I would not have imagined sucha staggering amount of addicted people could slove the addiction problem with therapies that didnt include a ” HIGHER POWER”. this has been my experience with hundreds of patients/clients and outsiders that ask about recovery, they were ALL seeking something that they could not find within themselves.
      So you see I had no idea about such a recovery program.
      I dont doubt you or your statements, I do however wonder why all these people didnt just recover with out God in the first place..

      Maybe you can explain this to me,as I admittedly am at a loss here,
      Your brother/servant in Christ Jesus
      Steven J Taormina

      • Guy Lamunyon says:

        Terry and Steven,

        My ONE SIZE FITS ALL comment was about use of a 12 Step program for all clients, family members and staff. The programs providing recovery choices are rare. Addiction ethics prohibit coercion (see NAADAC ethics statement) however clients are routinely coerced to use the 12 step programs.

      • Terry Gorski says:

        I have known many people who recovery without a belief in GOD. Many people learn how to detach from their own self-destructive beliefs, thoughts and feelings without connecting with God. An example of this would be Alpha-Theta Biofeedback Training which teaches people to become relaxed, detached, yet stay away of their thoughts, feelings, and future imagined experienced. This is also the core approach in Mindfulness Meditation which originated in Buddhist tradition and has now developed some convincing results that show it to be helpful even if the the religious/spiritual elements are not used. I personally believe mindfulness meditation works because people learn the skill of becoming detached and aware of the flow of thought and feelings while on a deeply relaxed state. They can then learn to notice (“isn’t the interesting I’m thinking and feeling ____.)” Then affirming that it’s okay to experience those thoughts and feelings. The finial step is release and relax and refocus the mind on the particular focus of the meditation.

        There are also people who can turn off addictive thinking by rational challenge, distraction with more positive things, and positive social interactions with other people.

    • Terry Gorski says:

      I don’t account for it. Those who claim to account for it call it either spontaneous recovery or find similarities shared by both approaches as say the success is based upon those similarities. The problem becomes very complicated when you consider that there is a difference between substance abuse and substance addition and this distinction is not evaluated in most studies.

      • Guy Lamunyon says:

        As I recall Jellinek found most members of AA were GAMMA types. I think many of my chronic relapsing veterans were also GAMMA types. A group of my former clients who failed with AA have formed a successful SMART RECOVERY group in Prescott AZ – meant to tell you about this before! The original question was about Telling The Truth – my answer is still YES!

  4. Terry Gorski says:

    Guy Lamunyon, Secular recovery groups are growing because the supreme court decisions require that alternatives exists. There has always been spontaneous remission from addiction and other chronic illnesses. In terms of substance abuse the diagnosis tic criteria are so lack you can’t tell what they are spontaneously recovering from. The one size fits all era has been over for nearly twenty years. JCAHO called for individualized treatment plans in the 1970’s. BTW: Various phenomena occur and rehire nothing from me in terms of accounting for it. You really need some new issues. These are old and rusty.
    I myself think it is the Space Aliens!.

  5. Guy Lamunyon says:

    Terry – my message was addressed to inri13151 (above – who ever that is)- I am glad we agree, including the Space Aliens which I have seen first hand ! ! ! !

  6. dwamp says:

    Terry we have been this voice to our AS for over 8 yrs now. You make it sound so simple

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